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BlackChampagne -- no longer new; improvement also in question.: Sieezupp your phalhpos. Urgent!



Saturday, July 28, 2007  

Sieezupp your phalhpos. Urgent!


That was the subject of a spam I just received. Like everyone else with an email address on a webpage, I get a ridiculous amount of spam every day. The vast majority of it gets nailed right into the junk folder, but maybe 10% survives to be individually deleted, and sometimes it's funny. It amuses me what they do to try and sneak past junk filters; usually by changing the spelling of words that will be banned. And since there's a ridiculous amount of spam of the, "Too small, your penis!" nature, you see a lot of creative spellings of words that could conceivably be synonyms for the male reproductive thingie. I don't believe I've ever seen it spelled, "phalhpos" before, though. It sounds a bit like one of the Greek demi-gods/monsters in Bookworm Adventures.

The rest of the mail is pretty straight-forward, and more inventive with the punctuation than with the spelling. Plus it even wraps up with one of those haiku-esque random strings of words that are thought to throw off junk filters. Since this one got through mine, perhaps they work?
Sieezupp your phalhpos. Urgent!

Ladies always giggled at me and even guys did in the public toilets!
Well, now I laugh at them, because I took Mega Dik
For 4-6 months and now my dick is much bigger than "average" size.

Web-Site of our shop

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

not. While his own parents had doted on him and his brother, he, found him in faraway Minnesota. Jim Marquez was then a 33-yearold Marquez reported for work on January 1, 1983. Soros turned over half Their departure sliced the value of the fund almost in half-to $193.3 Investor. Next to his smiling face on the magazines cover was the/font>
That's all a quote, including the half-broken font tag at the end. The URL points to the neutrally-named http://nevadacor.com/, which redirects you to http://a1herbals.net/, which is worth a look if you're bored. It's NSFW with two sets of before/after photos of the naked male thingie right on top of the page, but what amused me was the faux-scientific babble throughout, and the somewhat disturbing medically-themed diagrams of the male phalhpos. They've got skinless penis, and then cross section of penis, either of which would be enough to trigger a witch-burning riot in many parts of Africa.

I do like this aspect of their pitch:
Unlike pumps, weights and surgery, MegaDik delivers results that are safe and permanent! When you reach the growth size that you want to achieve, you no longer need to take MegaDik. GRADUAL penis enlargement is the key to effective, permanent results. Other forms of penis enlargement can't deliver permanent results, SAFELY, because they go against the physical laws of the body. The body grows and develops GRADUALLY, not over night! This is why MegaDik is the greatest breakthrough product in the history of male enhancement! Penis enlargement, as we know it, will never be the same.
In other words, you'll take their pills for months and months before you give up on them actually doing anything. I'd go on, but I've so frequently expressed my amazement that people make millions selling a bottles of M&Ms for $50 that I'm kind of burned out on the subject. Get over your tiny penis, no one really cares, and learning to last longer than 30 seconds and/or how to perform really good cunnilingus will get you 1000% further than an extra inch would anyway, my man.


While we're on the topic though, what would be interesting was if there actually were a non-surgical, physically-difficult way to enlarge the penis. Say there were something like sit ups or push ups that made the dick bigger, but that were exercise-like in their execution. Would men be sufficiently motivated to actually to it? I suspect not.

Everyone knows how to have a good body; eat less fatty crap, exercise, lift weights, etc. It's not exactly a secret. Stop drinking soda and eating at McD's, jog up a steep hill every morning, do some situps, and in not too long you'll melt away enough body fat that your new muscle will be fetchingly-outlined by your skin. (Assuming you don't weigh like 400 pounds to start with, have horrible health problems, etc.) Everyone knows this, and yet hardly anyone does it, and since the results are desirable but obtaining them is tiring, there are countless fad exercise machines that promise to do the work for you. Of course they don't work, since the only way to get exercise-like results is to... exercise, but they sell millions of units to people who use sometimes even remove the Crunch-Master 2000™ from the UPS package before realizing that the machine 1) does nothing, or 2) requires effort to use, at which point it gets stuffed into a closet or under a bed and is never seen again.

Would an uncomfortable, sweat-inducing, painful exercise that made the phalhpos larger be any different? Almost every guy says he wants a bigger dick, and plenty of men are willing to take some magic pill, or jerk off with some kind of appliance, or even get surgery to try to make it happen. All things that are expensive, like a home workout machine, but that don't require any personal determination or effort, unlike a home workout machine. If it required 1000 push ups a day, even if they were cock pushups, I rather suspect we'd still see just as much phalhpos sieezupp emails as we do now, only the words, "Without tiring exercises!" would be added to the copy.

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Comments:

This part of their pitch is pure genius: "When you reach the growth size that you want to achieve, you no longer need to take MegaDik."

I can think of no better way to ensure that a man will never stop using a product than to tell him that his dick will keep growing until he stops.


 

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